I just cannot deal with this.

I had promised myself that I would write every day. Today is day 14 and we have just been told that the lockdown has been extended until May 3rd. We are getting used to staying home. Not ideal but I feel that we are keeping ourselves relatively safe. I ventured out to get some more fresh salads and other items today. The supermarket was pretty well stocked. We are very blessed in our area as our stores are still pretty stocked up. . They all seem to have no TP but we have enough for a while.

Most days I cannot make it through the days without two Ativans. I know it is not a solution but sometimes it just gets too much. I get so freaked out that I want to vomit. I was not really going to write today but I have to get this off my chest just for my own sanity. The thing that upsets me the most is that people die alone without their loved ones. I just cannot wrap my brain around the fact that if you are sick they take you to the hospital alone. Your family cannot be there. They cannot check on you and if you pass away your body gets put in a refrigerator truck. This just upsets me so badly.

The doctors and nurses are heroes. They are superhuman and we really appreciate everything that the first responders are doing to save lives. Hearing their accounts of their days makes me so sad. They are also mothers, fathers, daughters and sons. They have families. They put their lives on the line every day and their families are making huge sacrifices. Thank you. You are all angels.

This is short. I just had to write this down to get it out of my system. Love your family. Hold your loved ones close. PLEASE,PLEASE stay at home, the vulnerable amongst us appreciate it. There are too many people ignoring the advice. The longer you ignore the rules the more people will die and the longer we will be in lockdown. Love and Peace.

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