Savage Sadness

fullsizeoutput_5d33Happy Tuesday! Well as happy as I can make it I guess.  I am just feeling so bummed since the boy’s birthday. He was so busy living his life we barely got a chance to even speak to him on his birthday. I can honestly say it has really affected my mood. I am sad and a little mad but I realize that things are not the same. While I understand that he had an out of town visitor and that when we called a bunch of people came into the room with his roommate but it did not prevent the truly bummed sadness. Having to try and figure this one out alone because there was no Not Jean for this week because of the public holiday. I actually think I will change the topic because it is too hard to talk about it that much and thinking about it is not very good either. My feelings are befuddled again.

Last night I could not sleep again and I was up until 3.30am doing work for my math class….anything to keep the brain occupied. Of course, I slept until 10:30am. I had my portfolio class this afternoon. A really pleasant and no pressure class. I normally leave when people start lab time because I have a laptop to take on projects at home. Stopped off at Whole foods for a few items and now I have been chilling at home. I am trying to decide plans for the rest of the week. I thought of going to visit the folks in the south bay and I am trying to decide if  I should try and get through a gentle yoga class tomorrow or go to the restorative on Friday. Need to think about it for a while. I could really do with some actual exercise and I have another iron infusion on Thursday and those do seem to knock my socks off for a few days.

Apart from that, there is really nothing exciting to report. My weight is driving me nuts. Yesterday I actually went down to 860 calories and I shit you, not the scale was slightly up this morning. W T F. So depressing that the weight will not move. This is why I need more exercise.

Oh well sorry to tell you that is about all I have to offer. I did not even have an original photo for today.

Happy Humpday for tomorrow.

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